Phoenix: Rising

wow

Thu, 25 Sep 2008 11:59:54 GMT

I completely forgot I had this. I'm not sure if I'm going to start using it again or not. If I do it will probably just be to post things I'm writing or song lyrics that I'm currently obsessed with.
Its been a very eventful year to say the least.

Maybe ill try to write about everything sometime.

Text me if you still read this.
510.258.9649

'In reality, all we have is time. Don't waste a single moment regretting the past. Savor every second. Love every minute.'

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Tue, 30 Oct 2007 21:28:45 GMT

Long update will be posted later.

how are things my dear internet?

Thu, 26 Jul 2007 23:30:13 GMT

I guess i should update...

I can't really complain about anything right now. There is still a ridiculous amount of tension when im around my dad. We don't argue as much anymore, but i cant tell he's still mad that i dont want to 'carry on his legacy' or whatever.

Work is pretty good. I don't hate my job yet, so i guess thats a plus. Uh not much to say, work is work.

I still owe about 800 bucks on my tickets. Then i can finally start driving again, well legally anyway.

In other news, ive rediscovered an old favorite song. 'Moments In Love' by Art Of Noise.
This song has been sampled so many times it would be impossible for you not to know the melody.
(Tech N9ne, Bone Thugs, MIMS, Ashanti, and Lloyd off the top of my head)
This is one of those background noise songs. I put it on and keep the volume kind of low. It kinda forces you to block everything else out to hear it better which helps with stress release and whatnot.

If all goes according to plan, ill be moving in with my sister from another mister in september.

My Red Horizon family will be back in town next week. drunkness will ensue.

Mobile Internets!!

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 20:17:36 GMT

im posting from my psp right now. more on that later...

These city lights don't shine as bright as they once did...

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 08:30:44 GMT

I definitely want to move away. As soon as possible.

Things arent what they used to be. I need a permanent break...

Mon, 02 Jul 2007 08:00:59 GMT

holierthnthou05: dude
holierthnthou05: im in a bind
holierthnthou05: i dont know if i want rub one out
holierthnthou05: or calculus
Four Count Pulse: ....
holierthnthou05: lol
holierthnthou05: rub one out is hella funny
Four Count Pulse: oh wait
Four Count Pulse: songs
holierthnthou05: lol
holierthnthou05: LOL
Four Count Pulse: oh man
Four Count Pulse: whoa
holierthnthou05: YOU THOUGHT I WANTED TO RUB ONE OUT
holierthnthou05: lollll
Four Count Pulse: yeah
holierthnthou05: dfajasd
Four Count Pulse: hahaah
Four Count Pulse: you should have seen my face
holierthnthou05: LOL
Four Count Pulse: i was like =-O

Serious entry to be posted tomorrow, when im thinking straight....

Thu, 21 Jun 2007 08:43:04 GMT

Kelly Clarkson is the shit.

Fuck all yall.

Mon, 21 May 2007 08:41:42 GMT

Four Count Pulse: but mushrooms arent shit
holierthnthou05: no they just grow on shit
Four Count Pulse: your point has no place here
Four Count Pulse: youre comparing apples and oranges
holierthnthou05: you have no place here
holierthnthou05: go away
Four Count Pulse: and im allergic to apples
Four Count Pulse: so take that shit somewhere else
holierthnthou05: good i'll bake u an apple pie
holierthnthou05: but tell u its something else
Four Count Pulse: i can eat apple pie
Four Count Pulse: and applesauce
Four Count Pulse: i just cant eat a regular ass apple
holierthnthou05: ass apple
Four Count Pulse: something with the acid balance or someshit
Four Count Pulse: yes
Four Count Pulse: ass apples are gross
holierthnthou05: i'll stick an actual apple in there then
holierthnthou05: and u won't know till its too late and ur eyes are swollen shut and ur mouth puffs up
Four Count Pulse: you have issues
Four Count Pulse: once im better ill tell everyone you knew i was allergic to apples
holierthnthou05: ur face will have issues
holierthnthou05: when i giveu that apple
Four Count Pulse: and youll go to jail for attempted murder
Four Count Pulse: it will be a glorious day
holierthnthou05: no because u said u wern't allergic to apple pie
holierthnthou05: and that aple just happened to slip
holierthnthou05: oops?
Four Count Pulse: i hate you
Four Count Pulse: if theres a whole apple in an apple pie i think i would notice it
holierthnthou05: no cuz that aple pie will be soooo good
holierthnthou05: and u'll be like omg i don't wanna stop
holierthnthou05: and u'll just shove it all in ur mouth
holierthnthou05: and bite into an apple
holierthnthou05: and oops
Four Count Pulse: meanwhile youre lauging maniacally
holierthnthou05: basically
Four Count Pulse: and disconnecting the phone so i cant get help
holierthnthou05: oh.. i wasn't gonna do that
holierthnthou05: but u just aided in ur own attempted murder
holierthnthou05: thanks
Four Count Pulse: no problem
Four Count Pulse: if this is gonna go down i want it to go down right
holierthnthou05: u could possibly go to hell becuase jesus doens't like ppl that try to kill themselves
Four Count Pulse: oh good point
Four Count Pulse: and you could tell the media that you found out at the last minute that i was allergic and you couldnt stop me
Four Count Pulse: and then you can write a book and make all kinds of money
holierthnthou05: nice
holierthnthou05: and then i can rub it in ur familys face that i made money off ur death
Four Count Pulse: and my family cant say anything cause you were the only one there and they have no proof that youre the 'Apple Pie Murderess'
holierthnthou05: :-)
holierthnthou05: killing u is gonna be so much fn
holierthnthou05: fun
Four Count Pulse: and then you can like plant suicide notes in my pockets
holierthnthou05: i should slit ur wrists
Four Count Pulse: and post all kinds of shit on my myspace
Four Count Pulse: wow...
Four Count Pulse: did i just help plan my own demise?
holierthnthou05: lol ya
Four Count Pulse: awesome

pure chance

Tue, 15 May 2007 22:19:48 GMT

Last night I had the best night ive had in a very long time. I got off work at about 11:45 and walked to bart to catch the last train out of fremont. Then, i literaly ran into this girl that i havent seen in probably 8 months or so. She was going to the city with her two friends. They didnt have a plan, only a time to be back at the bart station for the first train back from the city. So i thought to myself, 'When the hell am i ever going to see this girl again' and decided to go with them.

After starting a conversation with a random black lady that was going to the city as well, we all transfered at the 12th street station. We talked with the black lady about where we should go when we get to the city, and she suggested a 24 hour diner called orphan andy's. It was in the casto, where jessicas friend wanted to go anyway, so it worked out great.

Right before our stop, another random lady on the bart started talking to us because Jessica and her friend Danae were hanging from the handrail things on the roof. Apparently that made her night, and we started talking about stuff to do in the middle of the night in the city. Our stop came up, she commended us on our sense of adventure, and we were on our way.

We started off down market street towards the castro, and stopped at safeway to get some alcohol. As we walked down the street we heard a group of drunk guys singing Bohemian Rhapsody at the top of their lungs, so what else is there to do but join in. They were across the street, mind you, so we are like yelling to each other between the night owl buses and the street cleaning trucks. A few blocks later they arrive at their bar and we part ways. According to the random bart lady, the diner should be just one more block.

We get to orphan andy's and immediately i knew it was a good decision. There were drunk gay people outside being drunk and gay. Our server was loud and kinda reminded me of Dane Cook. Once we got comfortable with the place it was on. We poured our change into the jukebox and made this place into a karaoke bar. Jessica was dancing with all the gay servers. Oh, good food too :-p

After a while i decide to have a smoke, and Danae follows me. We start talking about things I cant remember right now and all the different gay pins in the window of the store next door. We finished each others sentences left and right. All i could do was smile at her. After about another 40 minutes of us being outside alone, Jessica and Jason come outside to find us making out on the bus stop bench across the street. They whistled at us and applauded and all that good stuff. It was pretty funny. I could have sat on that bench with her forever.

Anyway, we left the diner 3 hours later at about 5 o'clock. The train came just as we got to the station. Danae fell asleep on me and Jessica and Jason were making kissy faces at me the whole ride home. We transfered to a fremont train at Bayfair and used that time to say our goodbyes. We got to my stop, I gave her one last kiss and started to walk home.

I got home at about 6:30 and I slept until an hour ago.

Nights like that make everything worth it.

I dont know how to end this entry so im gonna go get ready for work (5-close)

Give it your everything, then give it more...

Sat, 12 May 2007 08:44:33 GMT

Okay so my brother got a 360 yesterday, but i have to be like a ninja when i play it because of my dad. See he seems to think that video games are for kids and i should have grown out of them by now (im fricken 20, but whatever) so while im still living here at home i cant play video games. At least not when hes home ;)

Anywho, today was a good day. I woke up around 1pm, feeling tired as hell because i slept for more than 5 hours (thats another post completely) i waded through the mass of clothes between my bed and the door, handled my business, and stared at the internet for about an hour. My older brother got home from CCA with a cake and some tarts he made. The tart was good but the kiwi in it was like crunchy almost, and it kinda scared me. I decided to get dresses/cleaned up around 2:30 and convinced my brother to drop me off at the bart station at about 3:15 even though I didnt have to be at work til 6. I actually enjoy being at work. Everyone there and at gamecrazy are completely awesome. Going to work is something I truly look forward too. The shit pay is ofset by the awesomeness of the job and my coworkers, not to mention i get to play video games whenever I want at Gamecrazy :-p

Work wasnt too bad. Kinda busy, but not too crazy. 28 Weeks Later came out later, so i guess everyone went to see it. I rented Dead Rising and Lost Planet for 360, fuckin score. Free rentals = love.

Hopefully ill be buying myself a new cell phone next paycheck, if not it will be next next paycheck :-p

I think thats it for today....

Life is finally taking its foot off of my neck. Im on my way out of the ashes.

-Darren

Fri, 11 May 2007 06:05:55 GMT

First post.

The is all part of a larger process of rebuilding and self realization. Im on my way out of some serious bullshit that was going on with my family and i think were all a lot closer because of it.

A new leaf has been turned over, and I want to thank everyone thats been down with me no matter what.

Theres going to be some real shit posted here and I wont apologize for anything. I get fed up sometimes and this is my release valve.

This is life. This is wrong. This is right. This is me.